When it comes to partner sex toys, few are as iconic or intriguing as the double ended dildo. This simple yet ingenious toy promises a unique form of intimacy and simultaneous satisfaction that can elevate your connection to a whole new level. But for many, the question remains: how to use a double ended dildo effectively and comfortably?
Forget any initial intimidation. This toy is a gateway to incredible communication, exhilarating exploration, and powerful, shared orgasms. Whether you’re in a same-sex or heterosexual partnership, or simply curious about new forms of pleasure, this guide is your ultimate resource.
We will walk you through everything from pre-play preparations to seven sensational positions that will make you a confident expert in mutual pleasure.
Table of Contents
- What Exactly is a Double Ended Dildo?
- The Ultimate Pre-Play Checklist: 5 Essential Tips Before You Start
- How to Use a Double Ended Dildo: 7 Incredible Positions to Try
- Choosing Your Perfect Double Ended Dildo
- Conclusion: Embrace a New World of Shared Pleasure
What Exactly is a Double Ended Dildo?
A double ended dildo is a sex toy consisting of a single shaft with a phallic or insertable head at both ends. It’s designed to be used by two people at the same time, allowing for simultaneous penetration and a uniquely connected experience. They are typically made from body-safe silicone, providing flexibility and a comfortable feel.
The Unique Design for Mutual Satisfaction
Unlike a traditional dildo or strap-on, the movement of one partner directly affects the other. As you thrust and grind against each other, the toy moves between you, creating a rhythmic and shared sensation. This back-and-forth motion builds a powerful feedback loop of pleasure where you are both giving and receiving at the exact same time.
Are They Just for Lesbian Sex?
Absolutely not! While they are incredibly popular lesbian sex toys, double ended dildos are for anyone with a sense of adventure. Heterosexual couples can use them for simultaneous vaginal and anal penetration, or for two partners with vaginas to enjoy mutual stimulation. The key is creativity and a desire for connected pleasure.
The Ultimate Pre-Play Checklist: 5 Essential Tips Before You Start
Success with a double ended dildo begins before the toy even comes out of the box. A little preparation makes all the difference.
1. Communication is Everything
Talk to your partner. Discuss what you’re curious about, any boundaries you have, and what feels good. Continue this communication during play with phrases like “Faster,” “Slower,” or “Just like that.”
2. Choose Your Lubricant Wisely
This is not optional. You will need a generous amount of high-quality, water-based lubricant to ensure comfort and smooth movement for both partners. Apply it to the toy and to both of you.
3. Hygiene is Non-Negotiable
Always clean your toy thoroughly before and after every use with warm water and a dedicated toy cleaner. This is crucial for sexual health, especially with a toy shared between partners.
4. Set the Mood
Create a comfortable, relaxed atmosphere where you both feel safe to explore. Light some candles, put on some music, and give yourselves plenty of time without pressure.
5. Start Slowly
There’s no need to rush. Begin by rubbing the toy against each other’s bodies and genitals. Gently introduce one end, then the other, coordinating your movements until you find a comfortable rhythm.
How to Use a Double Ended Dildo: 7 Incredible Positions to Try
Here are some of the most popular and pleasurable positions to get you started on your journey of shared pleasure.
Position 1: The Classic Face-to-Face
One partner lies on their back while the other straddles them, facing each other. This position offers deep intimacy, allowing you to kiss, make eye contact, and coordinate your hip movements easily.
Position 2: The Intimate Side-by-Side Spoon
Lie on your sides, facing the same direction in a classic spooning position. This relaxed pose is perfect for slow, sensual thrusting and is less physically demanding.
Position 3: The Seated Scissor
Sit on the floor or bed facing each other, with your legs wrapping around your partner in a “scissor” shape. This position gives you excellent control over the depth and angle of penetration.
Position 4: The Reverse Cowgirl Ride
Similar to the classic face-to-face, but one partner faces away from the other. This changes the angle of penetration, potentially targeting different pleasure spots like the G-spot or A-spot.
Position 5: The Standing Embrace
For the more adventurous, stand and face each other, with one partner’s leg wrapped around the other’s hip for stability. This requires balance but offers a uniquely powerful and dominant experience.
Position 6: The Solo Grind
One partner can lie on their back while the other uses their end of the dildo to grind against their clitoris, offering a break from penetration and focusing on external stimulation.
Position 7: Exploring Anal & Vaginal Play
For couples where one partner has a vagina and the other is open to anal play, this toy offers the thrilling possibility of simultaneous vaginal and anal penetration, creating a sensation of incredible fullness and connection.
Choosing Your Perfect Double Ended Dildo
When you’re ready to buy, consider these factors from our curated collection of double ended dildos:
- Size: If you’re new, start with a smaller, slimmer model. Pay attention to both the length and the girth (diameter).
- Flexibility: A more flexible dildo will be more forgiving and adaptable to different body shapes and positions. A firmer one offers more direct pressure.
- Material: Always opt for 100% body-safe silicone. It’s non-porous, easy to clean, and feels fantastic. Reputable sources like the UK’s sexual health charity Brook always advise choosing body-safe materials.
- Texture: Choose from smooth and sleek for a classic feel, or veined and textured for extra internal stimulation.
Conclusion: Embrace a New World of Shared Pleasure
Learning how to use a double ended dildo is about more than just a new way to have an orgasm; it’s a profound exercise in communication, trust, and mutual satisfaction. It encourages you to tune into your partner’s body and pleasure in a way that few other experiences can.
By starting slow, communicating openly, and experimenting with different positions, you can unlock a dynamic and deeply satisfying new chapter in your sex life. This isn’t just a toy; it’s a tool for connection.